Two weeks ago, two days after my first treatment—ouch—we had a follow-up appointment with my obstetrician to see how I was recovering from my laparoscopic surgery and with my D&C’s. Plural.
Everything was great, and I was healing well. My doctor, who is amazing, also told us that our baby was/is a girl! I cried. I don’t know why, but I cried. What a roller coaster. I felt such a sense of peace and sadness at the same time. An incredible blend of grief, joy, relief, loss and a spark of the beginnings of closure all braided together in one single moment. So yeah, I cried.
After a few days, Tim and I decided on a name for her: Gabriella Joy. We’ve put a lot of thought behind the names of our girls, Kiersten Bethany—Christ follower and Bethany after a very special place in my heart in Michigan. Haven Grace—A safe place, also named in honor of Corrie ten Boom and Grace after the freely given, unmerited favor and love of God.
We put the same thought behind naming Gabriella Joy. Gabriella in Swedish means strength from God, which we are so blessed with and pray for daily—sometimes hourly. And Joy, which means rejoicing because we know that she is in heaven rejoicing with Jesus and our grandparents and other family members and friends. She’s probably collecting beach glass with my grandma Barnard on a beach like Bethany just like I did here on Earth.
My dear friends found one of the most perfect gifts for me. For Christmas Tim got me a necklace with a bird for every member of our family. My friends spent a lot of time searching the internet and found the jeweler who made it and bought a bird for Gabriella Joy. So amazingly sweet. Of course I cried when they gave it to me. I have the best friends.
Kimberly Beats Cancer 
What a beautiful name. I love Gabriella Joy for coming into your life even as briefly as she did. Someday I will kiss that sweet face. She is a hero to me saving you by her presence then quietly leaving so you could start winning this battle. Very bittersweet. You honor her, will celebrate her and grieve for her. She’s in very good company and so are you. I love you!
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I agree with your Mom, Gabriella Joy is a beautiful name for the precious little girl that you carried for such a short time. I do believe that she had a very special purpose, without her, you may not have found your cancer as quickly as you did!
I look forward to meeting this precious little angel one day!
I have to admit that while reading this, I did shed tears at the sadness of never meeting or holding this dear granddaughter on this side of heaven as well as the thought of what you two must be feeling. This makes the loss so much more real, not that it wasn’t already, now we can call her by name.
I love the necklace that you’ve been wearing, I didn’t know the symbolic nature of it, now I think it’s even prettier than I first thought, and you do have amazing friends to go out to find another bird for it!
I love you Kim!❤️ I love your honesty and your strength and your faith! You and the girls and Timothy are in our constant prayers!❤️🙏🏻❤️🙏🏻❤️🙏🏻❤️🙏🏻❤️🙏🏻❤️
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My goodness, Kim and Tim – Gabriella may be in heaven already but she is touching lives here on earth and will live on as a beautiful memory until you meet with her again crossing into heaven. Continuing to keep you in my prayers.
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Sweet Kim,
In our personal branch of the family tree, we have Kara Joy and Ellie Joy. How sweet to know that Gabriella Joy shares their beautiful name! 💕
Kim, you have been so strong as you are walking through these trials. Many would have crumbled, but I love reading of your faith and trust and hope in God. Hold on, dear girl. I love Ps 30:1-5, especially the end that says “sorrow may last for the night, but JOY comes in the morning!” Our good, good, loving Father promises His joy. It will yet come.
We love you and Tim so much!
Hugs,
Aunt Twyla
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